February 17, 2004

10:16am

It is Tuesday again. Things changed again. No "seven hour straight" day as planned before, instead some students raised hell (finally) and got things changed back to the regular half an hour break.

I'm not surprised that it took so long since the program head is well...a little "disinterested" in some student needs. Last week we were handed out our practicums for summer, luckily I got Burnaby / New West, but some other students received victoria (the island), and interior BC, as well as one who was basically left alone to flounder around and fend for himself.

He was significantly stressed out...and I dont' know what happened around that.

Myself, I am VERY lucky to have gotten the placement that I did get. Close to home and relatively close to work, perhaps I *CAN* keep my job over the summer...but then I'll be really bloody tired too.

I'll see.

I've been feeling antisocial to the point of puking. I also felt like I was coming down with something yesterday, and I feel 70% here today. Just took an exam and I probably did better in it than I had expected, given the large amount of time that I didn't study for it.

If anything, the beginning of this year has been very lucky for me.

...after 12 meal replacement bars, one package of Wasa crackers, about five grapefruit, and lots of fiber and fruits and veg, I was 135. GOOD.

Then I weighed myself this morning, only to find myself at 138 again. phooey.


10:33pm. Funny how I journal almost 12 hours apart here.

Just waiting on Mark to call me back.

Back to my antisocialism. I feel...out of place. It leaves me with nothing to say and no one to say it to. Which kind of stems from my feeling like everyone is annoying the shit out of me.

I was sparring with my sister, half in jest, half in pity, "how the hell do people GET like that?!?!?" In referrence to a somewhat elderly neighbour of ours who likes to "spy" on people in the dark. This woman walks along the back alley / lane of our block and peers into neighbours' yards. We've caught her at our house, various other neighbours. She also likes to steal pails of dirt and soil from houses that have been built recently.

Like...WTF man! When we pulled out of our garage the other night, in the six-o-clock darkness, I spotted a shadow at the end of the lane, again, peering through the fence of an occupied house. Perhaps she's planning on digging up their daffodil bulbs or something???!

Then there's this girl in my class who is plain...I-Don't-Know-What. I've lamented the tales of her daily torture to Mark, and he thinks she plays "stupid" for attention. As in, "bad attention is better than no attention". I dont' know what to think.

This chick yawns with her mouth WIDE open (no cover) and her mouth STINKS on occasion while she's doing this, she's hacking and sneezing and wheezing and snorting snot and still prefers to talk to you like *this*, she answers with the most *PROFOUND* answers in class, and breaks into long-winded anecdotes and examples during lecture. There was also this one time where she had taken off her shoes, folded her feet on top of her desk, and kept them there for the duration of the lecture. I find her interruptions disruptive and disrespectful to the flow of class, irrelevant to the material at hand, and just plain RUDE.

So. HOW the HELL do people GET like this?!! Is it the upbringing? The behavioural conditioning that they deem their actions "acceptable"? Do they know they're making an ass of themselves?? Do they care?

Geez.


I had a dream about mice again. This time it was a little cute, although strange in the least. Me and Mark are walking into an asian restaurant -- I think it's one we went to over the weekend -- and I look over into a corner of the windowsill to find two baby brown mice eating and squirming / milling about.

Mice..restaurant...In real life I'd be wigging out and freaking and making a huge scene about the mice. But instead, in the dream, I pull Mark aside and admire them quietly and even remark, "aren't they cute?" (which they were..but they, in no way, belong in a restaurant) ..Then we actually proceed inside to eat. Wierd.

We were talking about recent wierd dreams we've been having since the weekend. Like wierd, vivid, dreams. Only I can't remember much of them now, just that they were indeed strange.

G'nite. Going to the gym tomorrow morn.

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