The first thing I thought when I woke up was Mark. I spent last night with him, and I felt a longing for him. His companionship, his selflessness, his love.

Then I listened to the news on my clock radio. I couldn't believe it. I thought it was some sick joke...my mistake in hearing.... it couldn't be..right?

It made me want him more.

I plodded down to the living room and carried out a morning conversation with my mother in grogginess. And I watched, on my morning, as the entire story unfolded. I watched the smoke billow out of the trade center building...heard witnesses speak of what they thought were debris falling out of the windows--and realizing it was people, not debris, jumping to their death.

I watched as the second tower came down, and heard about the crash at the Pentagon, and Capitol Hill, and then Pennsylvania. It was like a dream--but it wasn't.

I didn't want to go to school today. I wanted to spend it at home, or at Marks' house with his fluffy cat. I wanted to cry...

I don't even want to imagine what it was like..the firemen and the workers and the children....everyone in that mess.

My heart goes out to those who lost lives and family or friends this morning.