I was going to tell him tonight.

Of course it would have been easier had he been with me this Canada Day evening. Instead, I watched the fireworks with my brother and cousin.

Somehow, the last time I watched fireworks, I vowed I'd never watch them alone again. And I'm disappointed. . .someway it seems that fate will not let it be.

It would have been so perfect...in the summer breeze and the sparkle of light to whisper, eyes glowing amist festivities, "I love you."

My heart is such a silly thing.

"Love makes sense.." I once wrote. So perhaps this isn't.

Love wouldn't place us 12 years apart, nor would it drive him up to Squamish when I wanted him the most. It woudln't call me "kiddo", or not realize how to feel.

Love is a demon.

I wish he were more romantic...he always says that I'm too romantic for my own good. But aren't love and romance synonomous?

Perhaps this isn't.