RUN SHEET
02/05/23
Innocence is a hell of a thing.
I don't remember what it was like to be innocent, though I know I once was. I don't remember how it felt to have never seen a dead human, or a human die.
Seeing it for the first time is like stepping through a door. The more death you see the further you travel inside the door. After a while you turn around to see where you came from and realize you're too far inside to ever find your way out again. The genie is out of the lamp and you'll never get him back inside.
Watching the rookie Firefighters can be a bittersweet thing. This week I got to watch one of our rookies step through a couple of doors in her journey. This has happened a lot of times in my carreer and each time I have to remind myself that they chose this job just like I did, and, unfortunately this is the price we all pay for the privilege of doing it.
Tuesday night we were called to a huge fire. A local store cwent up in flames. It was built thirty five years ago and was the first really big store here in town. When it was new it was the centrepiece of the community. Since that time it has been eclipsed in size and grandeur, the commercial hub of the downtown has moved elsewhere and until Tuesday it was a large second-hand clothing and furniture store.
Tuesday night it caught fire, and lordy was it a show.
The fire was big by any standard. The smoke could be seen from thirty miles away. When we were approaching we could see the flames from four miles away. I never get tired of looking at something like that from the window of a speeding firetruck. There was a large fire load in the building so there was no stopping it once it got hold. Unfortunately it had a good hold before the first alarm crews had gotten there.
Tuesday night my hall was sent to assist with this fire. It was another hall's responsibility but we were called in on the third alarm assignment. In the cab of the truck was one of our rookie FFs, she has about two months on the job and hasn't seen much. Her eyes were huge, she was in awe. I told her "Tonight you're my partner, stick to me like glue" She nodded, smiled, and set her jaw. There was no way she was going to let me down if she could help it. She knew that a call like this is where a reputation can be made or ruined for a newbie.
When we rolled up we were assigned to the roof of an adjacent building. Burning embers were raining down everywhere and threatening surrounding structures. It's one thing to lose a bilding like that, but it's another thing ENTIRELY to lose TWO buildings when only ONE was burning to begin withl. Our job was to ladder the neighbouring building, haul up a hose and extinguish anything that landed there. It afforded us a great vantage point to watch the proceedings. It also gave her a chance to ask questions and have them answered while doing an important job. It was lots of fun to watch her realize "This is a huge fire, a huge event in the community and I'm a part of it!" I think that what was going through her head was "Wow, I really AM a Firefighter!"
It made me smile. She's about half my age, about the same age I was when I joined up. I remember thinking stuff like that at milestone fires, fires that will always be remembered by this community.
"Were you there when that building burned down?"
"Yes, I was on the North side on a two-and-a-half"
It's been a week of innocence lost for her. Tuesday was her first big fire, she lost her virginity so to speak, and really, fire loss aside, it was a joyous thing. Tonight was her first fatal MVA. Her first dealing with a dead body. Her look was what you might expect. She had walked through a new door, she had witnessed and been part of something bigger than she realizes. She was a bit dazed, a bit horrified and a bit awestruck. It's been a hell of a week for her. It's when she found out that this job has lots of good things about it, and some real thrills and wonder. Unfortunately this week she also found out it has a pretty steep downside.