RUN SHEET
99/12/03
Well, I dunno if this counts as a journal entry or not, but it was some fun :)
Marlaina told me the other night that someone had told her that I could probably make opening a paper bag sound interesting. I considered this both a huge compliment and a challenge.
First and foremost I'd like to thank that person for the compliment, and to say how much the whole neighborhood's encouragement has meant to me. I always wrote for myself, never really thinking it was all that good. The compliments that I have recieved from the others in the neighborhood who are all great writers means a lot.
And now here's my answer to that personal challenge
:)
There it lay
Its brown wrinkled skin curled upon itself in chaotic disarray. It rested on the smooth tabletop, hunched like a wounded animal.
My approach was calm, on the surface but inside I was a maelstrom of emotion. Swirling eddies of hope and dread whirled about inside me. I seated myself before it, wondering, searching madly for some kind of clue, a sign, anything.
The shadows cast by the pitiless flourescent tubes seemed like malevolent eyes on its face. It waited there, patient, knowing I must come, attend to it, I needed it. It gave away nothing.
I sighed deeply, steeling myself for what was to come, trying to relax and accept whatever the gods decreed. I sat down before it, chanting my wishes and dreams silently to myself. Hoping, praying.
Tremulously my hands reached out, as if of their own accord, without conscious decision. The dry surface greeted them with a whisper.
Fingers exploring, working the rolled and crumpled surface upward I nearly wept with dread anticipation. What lay inside? The question almost wailed from me. I closed my eyes, willing myself to accept the inevitable, gathering my strength for the next instant when all would be laid bare.
My fingers gripped the sides and slowly pulled apart revealing all. The waiting was over, what lay before me in the harsh glare of this room was what I must accept.
The desolation of my soul was so complete, so utterly vast that I knew I could never go on. In front of me was the truth, the inescapable reality that I had dreaded for so long, that I had told myself could never be again, that I knew in my heart of hearts that I was wholly unable to face.
“What’d the wife pack for your lunch Dave?” from across the table.
“Jeeezus, it’s a frigging Baloney sandwich…AGAIN!)